The Death of a Business
"As I sat there listening to my friend I could tell he was going through many of the same emotions as if a family member had died."
A friend of mine was over recently for brunch. It was good to touch base with him to see how he was faring because he has just suffered a loss. Not a loss of a loved one or friend but the loss of his business. Death is not just about the loss of someone you have loved. Death is a transition and occurs in many places in our lives. Many times we experience these types of deaths and don’t even realize that we are walking through a grief journey over this loss.
As I sat there listening to my friend I could tell he was going through many of the same emotions as if a family member had died. He was experiencing:
- The loss of the future where his hopes and dreams had been invested. No longer would he be able to watch this creation, this entity grow.
- Saying goodbye to physical items that reminded him of his business. He said it was so hard to watch the office furniture be sold off and the business doors close. He agreed it had to be done but he said each piece held a memory – just like going through items of a house after a loved one has died.
- Legal matters that he has to attend to for closing down the business. People want to know how the remaining funds are going to be divided and who was going to have their fair share. Not unlike some readings of the will in some families!
- The emotions of grief that he was experiencing and how they were taking a toll on his body: trouble sleeping, food tasted bland, and he was wondering how much more of this pain he can take. He had symptoms of depression.
- Trying to understand who he was in light of this loss. Where does he go from here? How does he measure compared to others in his life? What fills the hole that once was his daily schedule? What is his new identity?
- Life has a different meaning to him. He said to me, “Kelly, my wife and I were watching a sunset over a lake just a week ago. I can tell you today that the sunset meant something different and more to me today then it did to me a year ago.” He does not take many things for granted anymore but enjoys what he has. I have heard the same sort of statements from many people as they navigate their grief and loss emotional landscape.
Be aware of the small and greater “deaths” in your life. It may not mean the loss of your business but it could be the loss of the way of doing business that you have done for so many years. You could be experiencing your child moving out of the home, going away to school, or joining the military. Remember that although these “deaths” are painful they do offer a place for growth and change. Finally, give yourself permission to grieve when these “deaths” occur. They are as real to your physical and mental body as if you had lost a loved one.
(Source: Beyond Funerals)
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